Dare I start to blog again? Dare I start by blogging something so personal?
I have a friend I love dearly who hates herself so very much....I try over and over again to tell her how wonderful she is, and how she needs to figure out a way to love herself...and then I realized that I am a bit of a hypocrite, and I would never want to pass on my feelings of self hate onto my beautiful babies.
So, in the interest of being real, of recognizing that we all feel some self hate, and that we really all shouldn't, I wrote out some self love about my most insecure parts of me:
1. Blue and purple Varicose veins and spider veins, I love your constant reminder of the endless patience I showed as I spent years on sales floors guiding customers through their choices, I look forward to your continued growth as I raise a couple of active beautiful children whom I plan to stand up for on multiple occasions.
2. Weird flesh colored mole thingy on the side of my nose, I appreciate the reminder that I am both my mother and my fathers child.
3. Lines that continue to multiply and deepen, remind me that emotion is never constant, life can be joyful, surprising, angry, loving, boring, happy, frustrating and sad etc....all leave imprints on my soul.
4. Too many to count stretch marks remind me that my body can pretty much take anything.
5. Wiry gray hairs I do so much to try to hide, thanks for sticking around through what seems to be the constant fallout.
6. Achy joints, you are staying intact, thanks for that...I'll try to up the usage to keep you oiled the best I can.
7. Fat, ample as you are, you keep me moving, eventually we will find a happy medium.
8. Dry wrinkly hands, you prompt me to hydrate when I forget.
9. Eye catching bosom, you help to keep the excess flesh well distributed.
10. Thunder thighs, strong as an ox, I'll stand tough a long while with you.
11. Double chin....I'm working on appreciating you, for now I'll try to just accept you.
12. Wobbly upper arms, you tighten when I flex, that's nice.
I know it would be a lie to say I am going to look at my body with love every day, that I will quit dying my hair, dieting, working out to get skinny, getting on the scale etc.... However, I make this promise that although there are parts of me that are hard for me to look at, my body paints the pictures in my biography, I will continue to work at finding ways to keep those paintings brightly colored.
